What Does Mentoring Mean to Us?
Mentoring Week continues here at CIW, and we talked to some of our own esteemed colleagues about what it means to be a mentor, what they’ve learned from their mentees and who the most important mentors in their lives are. (You may be surprised by the answers to the last question—how’s it going, SenatorBooker?)
What type of support and guidance do you provide your mentee?
In addition to group events put on by Horizons for Youth, we go to lunch, throw the football, go bowling [ed. note: Mike actually has a lot he can teach his mentee at the bowling alley.], visit colleges and so forth.—Mike Walsh, Author, mentor to De La Salle senior Jamarius Jennings
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| De La Salle senior Jamarius Jennings recently discussed the positive impact Horizons for Youth and his mentor Mike Walsh has had on his life. |
We talk on the phone, text and send Facebook messages. I’ve taken one of my mentees, Diamond to college orientation at Indiana State, and we also worked on scholarship applications and completed registration for courses together. I’ll go out for lunch or dinner with Diamond and Cassandraand with the YOU(th) Ambassadors. I also try to provide a barometer for the when the teenagers face difficult decisions. One of my mentees told me, “Before I do something, I think, Would Rachel be mad if I did it?” We talk a lot about how to prioritize education and work, how to budget and how to approach interpersonal relationships, and I was glad to hear that I provide some guidance as they work through pivotal moments. — Rachel Graham, YOU(th) Program Director, mentor to college freshmen Diamond and Cassandra and YOU(th) Ambassadors
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| Rachel Graham recently went to The Nutcracker with a group of CIW YOU(th) Ambassadors. |
I think the most helpful thing I’ve done for Daisia is connect her with amazing other people, organizations and activities in our city. I’m always enlisting friends and co-workers in her life, and unabashedly asking for opportunities on her behalf. I’m increasingly touched and surprised by others’ generosity, and her grandmother’s willingness to jump at every single available opportunity for Daisia. The guidance I give to Daisia ranges from help with bullying, to dealing with the pain of having 2 absentee parents, to her sister’s battle with cancer. I don’t have much wisdom on any of the above—mainly, I’m just someone who’s always there to listen and say I love you.—Leah Marshall, Director of Development, mentor to 11-year-old Daisia
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| Leah Marshall and her mentee Daisia show off their handmade cards. |
Mentorship is often described as a two-way street, with mentees teaching their mentors just as much as mentors guide their mentees. What have you learned from your mentee over the course of your relationship?
This is a false premise. It’s entirely a one-way street. I’ve been mentoring Jamarius since he was six—eight years ago—and it’s taught me, despite that last sentence, that I don’t have all the answers and that sometimes you arrive at them together with a kid.—Mike Walsh
I have learned so much from these students, their families and their culture. It’s broadened my horizons and made me a stronger person. I’ve been exposed to different communities and been embraced by so many people as I got to know Cassandra, Diamond and the YOU(th) Ambassadors and their families. I think these kinds of relationships break down silos of our segregated communities.—Rachel Graham
What individual stands out as the most powerful mentor to you in your life, and why?
I have had a number of mentors throughout my life. I can’t just name one. My mentors have been the people who have supported me through tough transitions and guided me through new situations. At any given time in my life, this may have been a teacher, a family member, a friend or anyone else who has provided me advice and support.—Rachel Graham
The key mentors in my life are unconventional (two don’t even know I exist!). The first is Senator Cory Booker from New Jersey. I respect Cory for his incredible ability to inspire others through his words and conviction, his servant leadership, his selflessness, and his dogged work ethic. Another mentor is the spiritual leader Byron Katie, whose thought leadership on embracing and loving your life just as it is have helped me to become more content, less judgmental, less worried, and simply happier. The final and newest mentor in my life is my incredible dance and fitness teacher, Melissa. One of the things I admire most about Melissa is her acceptance and encouragement of everyone, no matter what ability level they come in with. She’s taught me a lot about meeting people where they’re at and encouraging their journey regardless of their current abilities. I also really admire how Melissa ignites and energizes everyone she comes into contact with—despite the fact that she works 14 hour days on her feet.—Leah Marshall
Interviews are edited for clarity and length.
